(Photo shoot style, he's in a white jumpsuit, a wind machine is on, gross stuff is getting thrown at him from off camera)

Be proud of your mess! Send us your grimiest, stainiest shot and get your friends to vote for it. Heck, get them to send one in too!

(We see a stream of mayo, mustard and ketchup hitting his chest as he strikes various poses, vamping)

Gorgeous!

(Square of sod smacks him and falls off leaving a stain)

Totally hot!

(A whole painters palette gets tossed)

Artistic!

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